farts

Remember , we already have chapter one , " Sleep farts . "

记住第一章已经有了，“边睡觉边放屁”。

Or somebody made a chair that twitters when somebody farts .

还有人做了一个当人放屁时发推特消息的椅子。

There 's a scientific term for this totally common phenomenon , which we like to call a " brain fart . " " Brain fart " is used to refer to a temporary mental lapse or failure to reason correctly .

这种非常普遍的现象有个学名，我们称之为“大脑短路”。“大脑短路”是指暂时的大脑失灵，无法正确地进行推断。

Fart Two : The Analysis of Investigation Process and Results .

第二部分为课题的调查过程与结果分析。

The world 's most popular digital fart machine !

世界上最流行的数字放屁机！

He always comes up some brain fart that gets us into trouble .

他总是想出一些馊主意，给我们带来一堆麻烦。

Keeps his house so clean you can 't even fart .

他的房子搞得这么干净，连屁都不能放一个。

One who loves the smell of other people 's farts .

是那个喜欢别人屁味的人。

Ok , let me put a stop to that little brain fart right now .

好了，我来通一下你那塞住的脑子。

That 's a real brain fart , isn 't it ?

真是让人头大，是吧？

You ever fart so hard your back cracks ?

你有放过这么响的屁吗？

They got to get it all out because a lot of times dead people 'll fart .

必须要把所有的口子都堵上，因为死人常常会放屁。

A period I like to call the " fart honeymoon " .

我把这个阶段称为“屁的蜜月期”。

It is a brain fart of walking in this forest .

她为自己一时脑子短路而说的话道歉。

Now Beijing only breathing and fart don 't line up .

现在北京只有呼吸和放屁不用排队了。

Man 's word , like fart .

人的话，就象放屁。

Take care of the children , or they will get some brain farts to make you mass .

照顾好这些孩子，否则他们会想出一些鬼点子把事情搞得一团糟。

But also besides put a few fart besides , whats were pulled .

可是也除了放几个屁之外，什么也没有拉出来。

Like kill an old fart , forge his will !

比如杀死一个老家伙，伪造他的遗嘱！

Where did that old fart hide the key ?

那个老家伙把钥匙藏哪去了？

There was once a ghost , one day he put a fart and then died .

我就告诉他假装我刚放了一个很臭的屁。

We 'll go quietly like a silent fart .

我们就会像暗屁一样悄悄地走。

Hypocritical : looks like having it , however pass nothing , even a fart .

虚伪：好像是在大便，实际上连屁也没放一个。

They have to deal with grumpy old farts like myself .

他们必须跟像我这种老顽固打交道。

If I hear so much as a mouse fart in here tonight .

如果我今晚听到有半点声音。

Other factors besides diet determine the amounts and relative proportions of fart gases .

饮食外的其它因素则决定屁的多少和组成气体的相对比例。

But anything 's better than spending another evening playing checkers with this old fart

不过比起再花一整晚跟这个老头玩象棋做什么也不失为一个更好的选择

The love is like then and then , sometimes working hard for a long time but being a fart .

爱情就像便便，有时努力了很久却是个屁。

But I am not a fart face , I am his father .

就在我刚感觉好一点的时候，另一个屁又来了。

Life is like a piece of shit , always , one tries hard but ends in fart .

人的一生就象在拉屎，有时你已经很努力了可出来的只是一个屁。